I'm Stubborn...What Are the Desires of My Heart?

I was struggling with received criticism lately.  I kept thinking to myself that I hadn't really done anything wrong and the person who had approached me may have been the only one offended and it was her fault.  There is no reason for me to explain why that wasn't sitting well on my conscience and I kept dwelling on it.  That stubborn streak within me has come out a few times lately, actually.

I went to the temple shortly after receiving this criticism.  Which was, actually, really good timing for me, even though it wasn't my own plan and others just happened to push me in that direction.  As I sit in the chapel area waiting for sessions to begin, I've created the habit to read in the scriptures they usually have available.  So I did this.  I knew I wasn't feeling close to the spirit at the moment and needed to make things feel right again somehow.  At times like that, I like to open the book up randomly and let it just speak to me.  So that's what I did.

The word "peace" jumped off the page at me, but I was being stubborn, like I said, so I thought...hm...how about the other page.  I'll begin reading over there.  (Kind of dumb, huh...but *sighs* that's me.)  So I read the next page all the way to the bottom, then went back to the first page and read from the top.  I still hadn't really gotten anything that spoke to my soul until I once again came to the verse containing the word "peace" in it.  I finally conceded.

It was D&C 105:38-41 (I had read section 106 first...)
This is an indirect quote:
Sue for peace, not only to those who've smitten [me] but to all.  Proclaim peace! Propose peace...according to the voice of the spirit and all things shall work together for my good.  Therefore, be faithful and behold and lo, I am with you even unto the end.

I had been wanting to lash out to protect myself in a some sort of fight of flight knee-jerk reaction.  Now in reading this, I decided I needed to just let it go, and so I could return to a good state of mind and acceptance to the person who'd hurt me.  Immediately when I did this, it opened my eyes to the truthfulness in the criticism I'd received!  Now I can take it for what it's worth, learn from it, and move forward productively.

Later, I was studying Alma 7:23
"I would that ye should be humble, and be submissive and gentle; easy to be entreated; full of patience and long-suffering; being temperate in all things; being diligent in keeping the commandments of God at all times; asking for whatsoever things ye stand in need, both spiritual and temporal; always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive"

It struck me that these godlike traits and qualities: humility, patience, gentleness are CHOICES first.  I think perhaps all godlike qualities begin that way. Because we are not godly, of course, because naturally we are manlike and the natural man is far from being godlike.  So, if we want to develop qualities like that, we have to begin with the choice to be that way.  It isn't easy because it isn't natural.  It takes practice to develop these things into habit and then hopefully it can become a talent.

Last week, I was being truly harrowed up by things going on in the world right now.

I love people.  I just do.  It's maybe a godlike quality I was blessed with as a talent that just came with me.  I've been blessed and burdened with charity for others, and having that is something I value very much, but sometimes I've found it can handicap my judgement about some things.  I've been hurt, and sometimes I've been very wrong.

Facebook exploded with things about marriage equality lately.  It had been something I'd been contemplating about for over a year.  I struggle with it because my church does not support marriage equality.  I understand why the church doesn't.  I believe in what my church believes in.  Marriage is between a man and a woman, and is a beautiful and sacred thing in the eyes of God.  However, I love my friends and family members who want to be loved and have relationships and cannot do so without leaving the church behind.  It's been a struggle for me from the very beginning.

I know from personal experience that these people are good and God loves them because there would be no way He possibly would not.  I believe they have a place and it's beyond my mortal understanding.  But I know God has a place for them.

I believe in letting others find their place by whatever means they choose.  I am not in charge of other people.  God is.  He knows each person individually and He knows them and can take care of them and guide them to where they need to be.  But it's not up to me.  I also don't believe it's up to any politicians or government officials to decide.  This is why I decided to support marriage equality.

That exploded.

Of course I have many friends who did not see things the same way.  I have friends who did, yes.  But everyone's views are tainted by something and I just felt like I was floating in a bunch of biased articles and information as I continued to research the church's viewpoint as well as what other people said.  Even LDS people.

The more I stuck to what I said, the more horrible I began to feel, the more reading I did...and the further I felt I was pushing something good away.  I hated it.  I didn't want to go back on what I believed in.  I didn't want to betray other beliefs.  I was so conflicted.  Then I had a REALLY BAD day where everything felt upside down and just plane wrong.

I had a visit from a friend that day.  She is not LDS, but she is very devout and believes in true principles.  I expected her to take a side and give me a lecture the same way my Facebook friends had done.  The same way I had been doing to my Facebook friends.  Sadly.

But she didn't.  She stood there listening to me talk about my inner conflict and frustrations and responded with simply saying: It's not between you and your friends or even between you and your church.  It's between you and God, and it looks to me like you need to do some real praying to set things right between you and God.  No one else can tell you that.

I had been afraid to pray.  Actually, sort of avoiding it.  I would say my prayers, and once in a while feel that little push to pray about this subject, but I always would push it away.  Because I was scared of the answers I would receive.  I was afraid that God would tell me I was wrong.  I felt like I had to be right.  My loved ones deserve happiness the same as anyone.

I decided the entire Facebook discussion was driving the spirit away from me.  So I backed down and ended all discussions on the topic on Facebook.  I was not helping anyone by sharing my stubborn spirit with other people.  In fact, I was probably feeding the adversary's plan.  It makes me want to cry to even admit that.

But the truth is, I am right to an extent.  My homosexual friends and family members are indeed children of God and God loves them.  They deserve all happiness.  They deserve to be embraced and loved and fulfilled in life.  But having marriage with someone of the same sex, as much as it may seem to be the answer, will not in fact bring them the happiness they crave.  I wish it were that simple.  I wish they could just find a spouse and get married and live happily ever after.

But that is a fairy tale that doesn't exist.  Even for a straight person!  Marriage was not the happily ever after fairy tale ending for me, and I don't know anyone who would say they had one either when they were married.  It wouldn't be that way for a homosexual either.

I then read this article which helped me see the issue a little clearer from a non-religious perspective.

The entire thing breaks my heart.  Because I truly love these people and I know they are good.  I understand where they are coming from and why they are fighting so hard for the things they want in their lives.  But I honestly feel now that what they are fighting for so hard, while they believe it will bring them happiness, will in fact bring sadness...even at a catastrophic level.

I was being stubborn.  I didn't yield to the spirit.  Now that I have, it feels a lot better.  I'm more at home in my heart.  I will continue to support and love homosexuals.  Because they deserve finding every happiness in their lives.  But sometimes God's plan for that happiness is different then ours.  Sometimes following His will is harder then we can even imagine, because it goes against what we think is the best way.  But He sees all.  HE knows all.  All we have to do is trust in that and stop being stubborn.  Choose humility.  Choose gentleness.  Choose to be patient.  Sue for peace.

A New Year Begins

Over the last year, I have learned so much!  I'm so grateful for the people and programs that have come into my life over the past year to make me realize how much I had it wrong and how much I could change things to gain more happiness.

Happiness comes from within.  That was the biggest thing I learned this year.  I always knew it.  People had told me this for years.  It was like a cliche I couldn't get away from.  But I never knew how to do it.  I never knew how to create that happiness from within.  Now I do.  That's quite an accomplishment, I'd say!  Happiness comes from within when you truly learn to accept and love yourself.  Look in the mirror and say "I am beautiful" and believe it!  Then, it's going out and letting others enjoy who you are because you're a loveable person.  Giving that love to other people can really make you love yourself even more!  But instead of giving and trying to feel the love from without, it's loving first and then giving and it all expands from there!

I also learned more about hope this year.  I learned that hoping for something is the thread that keeps life moving forward.  All you need is that hope and the day can end and another begins.  I have learned that my Savior loves me.  He has given me everything and can give me more if I just ask.  He will help me with everything and He has the ability to make me strong.  I just have to turn to Him for the strength.  Sometimes it's the turning that's the hardest part.  Just look up!  You'd think it would be an easy thing.

I also learned this year to love my husband (anyway).  :)  I have really grown in this aspect.  I met my husband and I loved him because I love people.  I just do.  I loved him because I love everyone. (No wonder I was so bad at dating! I loved people and couldn't get the difference with anyone special so I'd say "I love you" and get these guys all excited in spite of myself.)  Then I loved him because I felt it was right to marry him.  Then I loved him because he was my husband and it was what I was supposed to do.  Then I denied within myself that it was real love.  Then I kicked myself for giving up on romance.  Then I "loved" him because I had to.  Then I got mad.  I got mad at myself.  I got mad at him.  I think I even got mad at God.  But this year has changed a lot.  This year, I looked at him and remembered the way I felt when we were dating.  I did love him that way!  I had loved him once, and he was still that same person.  He was still the awkward "NCMO" (non-commital make-out) King from college who hunched over his guitar and swung his keys around from his lanyard.  He was just more mature now.  He'd replaced the girls with politics and he replaced the music with sports.  But it was still him.  And I realized I wasn't giving him any credit.  I'd say this is quite the accomplishment for my year too.  I learned that love is not a noun, it's a verb.  I learned that if I don't LOVE my husband (as in, an action verb), then I won't ever love him.  It was a big change in the way I live, and it has changed my level of happiness as well.  Now I feel like I love my husband, not for any of the reasons I've stated before, but I love him because I feel good loving him.  I love him because it's a fun thing to do.  I love him because he deserves it.  I love him because I'm grateful for everything he does for me.  I love him because he's so handsome!  I love him because he's my children's father!  I love him because I'm going to be with him forever!  And forever doesn't sound so bad, actually.  (Especially because after this life, many of our little annoying habits and weaknesses will be much better!)

This year, I have learned to let go of things I cannot control.  I'm learning more about how to deal with the things I can control and trust God.  I have learned that trusting God is the real key to the atonement.  It has helped me to forgive myself.  It has helped me forgive others.  And I have finally been able to put the past firmly in the past!  I no longer stay up nights thinking about that moment in my sophomore high school year, or that day when I was single in college, or that thing I should have said back in my newly-wed days.  It's gone!  And that's such a relief!

Last New Years, I chose one word as my New Years Resolution.  Do you remember what it was?  If you do, I commend you for following my blogs for so long. :)  I'm loved!  :)  Anyway, go back and read that post if you want.  It's short.  Shorter than this one, for sure.  (And I said I wasn't going to have any long posts on this blog....sighs.)  My word for last year was "Whisper" and I think I've gotten SO MUCH better about keeping my voice down with my kids.  I'm far from perfect about it, of course.  But I'm much better.  I don't think I sat and acted like a three-year-old this year.  Maybe once. :)

But I've also gotten better at listening to that Whisper of the spirit.  It has blessed me so much!  Yet another huge lesson I have learned this year!  How to recognize the voice of the spirit and differentiate it from other voices.  I never realized those other voices were even out there! (Thus, the confusion on my listening to the spirit in the past!)  But they are!  The biggest key to listening to the spirit that I have found is this: It's light.  God is light.  Christ is light.  The spirit wouldn't feel heavy, like a brick on my chest trying to get me to do something.  Oh no.  It feels light and as though a burden is lifted from me.  So I started practicing following that light feeling and every time I felt the heaviness creeping up on me, (for example, when I would feel the impulse to be online to waste time) I would turn from it and do something better.  It has made an amazing difference!  Not only do I feel better because I'm making better choices in my daily life, but I'm finding it easier to follow that spirit because I'm actually listening!  Da-da-da DUM!!!  :)  It's been a wonderful thing.

So a New Year has begun.  2013 is upon us and I'm once again contemplating what to choose as my one little word for this year.

I've chosen "Serve" as my New Years Resolution One Little Word.  At the end of 2012, I had a new neighbor move in nearby and it gave me all kinds of opportunities to service.  I let her borrow my vacuum, I helped her unpack into her kitchen, I helped her decorate her kitchen, I stayed to lock up for her during an emergency, I babysat her little boy, I did her dishes, I took her breakfast, I invited her over for dinner, I helped her unpack her little boy's bedroom, I put him to bed for her when her other child was sick and she was busy with her, I've sat with her, I've chatted with her, I've accepted her completely, I've found we have so much in common, and I'm her friend.  From the very beginning, I was drawn to her spiritually.  I was becoming addicted to the beautiful feeling that overwhelmed me as I served her.  I kept finding more opportunities to do so.  And the fierce loyalty between us now is a wonderful reward.  It also brought that special Christmas spirit into my heart in a way I have never felt before.

So over the next year, I play to focus on this one little word.  I'm going to look for more opportunities for me to serve others.  Whether it is in my own home or elsewhere.  I want to keep this special spirit with me.   I want to remember it all throughout the year.

Another new tradition I decided to start is this thing I saw on Facebook.  So I have a jar on my piano now that is marked "Happy Happenings of 2013" and I plan to fill it with little papers containing happy things that happen throughout the year and so we can read and reminisce during next New Years.  I'm pretty excited about it.  So far I've cheated a little and placed the two movie tickets from New Years Eve inside (technically not 2013 but oh well).  We saw Les Miserable together and it was incredible!  Happy New Year, everyone!

(Yes, I'm finally finishing up this insanely long post!)

I Can Dream

Too often when we get married ... or maybe it's when we have children, we lose ourselves in that role.  I'm a wife now.  I'm a mother now.  Somehow being a mother makes us decide everything else doesn't matter at all and we forget our dreams.  We forget who we were once.

I started thinking about the things my husband wants and my kids need or want.  It's good to care about these things.  They are important things to care about.  It's good to value what other people want.  But don't lose yourself in it!  I got to the point where I would feel guilty for buying a bottle of fingernail polish for $2 because it wasn't important enough.  It was a waste of money.  I had to ask my husband's permission first.  Was it him that made me feel this way?  No, it was me.

Although it is not right to completely and selfishly disavow responsibilities for dreams, it is ok to dream!  It really is.

So sit down and remember who you were before you were married.  Remember what you cared about, what you dreamed about every day.  Remember what you aspired for.

Before I was married, I loved to sing.  I liked doing my hair.  I liked being with people and learning from them.  I wanted to write a book.  I wanted to be a mother someday, but I also wanted to travel.  I wanted to see Paris.  I wanted to see Prince Edwards' Island.  I wanted to meet celebrities.  I loved art.  I wanted to create it, but felt I couldn't do it well enough.  I loved climbing our willow trees.  I loved dreaming about love and romance.  I liked creating heartfelt gifts for other people.  I liked going places with friends.  I had a curiosity for being rebellious but never really was.  I admired rebels. :)  I liked to drive.  Just drive until I got lost and then found myself again.

That's still me.  I can still dream about these things.  Of course, I shouldn't strive for those dreams at the expense of what is most important to me, my family, but I can still dream of these things and remember who I am.  I can still remember what I used to care about, even if my husband doesn't care about those things so much.  It's ok to do that.  It's not selfish.

So go write down the things you value and dream about.  Just you.  Not what your kids like.  Not what your husband wants.  Just what you want.  It's ok to buy that bottle of fingernail polish once in a while.  It's ok to dream.

I Can Be a Tool in God's Hands

As I was preparing for Sunday, I was getting ready to teach my 11-year-old class and the lesson was on the destruction of the Jaredites in end of the book of Ether.  It's a crazy horrific scene of a bloody war with millions of people getting killed, bodies everywhere, and it all comes down to two guys (Coriantumr and Shiz) fighting each other and fainting because of blood-loss until finally one of them kills the other one.  Ether watches it all from a cave, and isn't sure if the last guy even survived, really.  Pretty crazy rated-R stuff to be talking to 11-year-old girls about.  But Coriantumr lives and happens to be the one that in an earlier chapter remembered the words of Ether, the prophet, and repented but had no power to help the rest of the people stop fighting.  He is mentioned earlier in the Omni, actually, which I thought was interesting.  Omni 1:20-21 says he lived with the people of Zarahemla for the space of "nine moons."

But anyway, the point in the lesson was that Ether had been preaching to these people multiple times, trying to get them to stop it!  He had gone down and told them to repent, to love each other, to follow the commandments of God and be kind again.  But they were too angry.  The spirit of the Lord no longer dwelt with them, as the scriptures said, and so Satan had full power over them.  So the lesson's focus was more on obedience to God's laws.  As I pondered this, I thought about how people often think of God's laws as rules that hold them back.  People want to have freedom, and this is often the case with teenagers - the world these girls are about to enter.  But the truth is, freedom is found in following God's laws.  His laws help us to be happy because as we do what is right, are choices have good consequences that make us happy.  Choices that are bad lead to bad consequences, unhappiness, and bondage.  So, even though a rule may seem like shackles, it is actually what helps us to be free.

As I pondered this lesson, I thought of a kite and found myself writing a poem!  It felt inspired and so I wanted to share it.  I gave the poem to the girls as a hand-out.

The Disobedient Kite

by Danielle Palmer

I once went flying with my master

He took me out on a windy day

He let me grow higher and higher

As the wind pulled me up and away

I pulled on the string he had tethered

Wishing to climb greater heights

I beckoned him softly as to whether

He’d give me my freedom in flight.

He shook his head at my imploring

Stating the string held me up

‘But the string just anchors my exploring!’

So I asked again, I wouldn’t let up.

Finally he said he would show me

The value in rules he had set

And he cut at the string from below me

Exulted, I leaned, the wind swept

But the soaring expected then faulted

And broken, I began the fall

For the connection I’d found as a burden

Was what held me up high after all.

I didn't make many edits to the thing.  It was like it just poured out of me.  It's simple, for one of my poems, but it served the purpose I wanted it to.  Then, while I was giving my lesson, we read this scripture together:

Ether 12:4
"Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with ^asurety ^bhope for a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which ^chope cometh of ^dfaith, maketh an ^eanchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in ^fgood works, being led to ^gglorify God."

The word "anchor" caught my attention here.  Because it is the very word I use negatively in the poem to describe the lack of freedom the kite feels.  But here in the scripture, it is using the word to describe a safety and peace.  If we keep that anchor there, and hold to our faith in it, we will be sure and steadfast, always doing what is right and finding happiness!

This really testified to me that God loves the girls in my class.  Even though I rarely have more then two students at a time!  I have a very small class!  But these girls are so special, and when I really pay attention and try to follow the spirit as I prepare my lessons, the Lord will work through me.  It made me so excited to feel like I was being used as a tool in His hands to bring this message to these beautiful girls.  I learned from it too!

It made me also rededicate myself as a teacher.  I'm going to try to invest myself more in the future in the lessons I teach so I can keep the spirit with me during my lessons and so we can learn and be uplifted by His words.

Aware That the Lord Is Aware

On Friday, we decided to ride our bikes to school.  Jameson started kindergarten that week and it was the first day all week that didn't have the sun blaring down in scorching heat.  So we got our gear together (the littlies riding in my bike trailer) and rode our bikes to school.  Livin' the dream! :)  He left his little two-wheeler outside with the pile of bicycles from other kids and went in with an excited grin.  I have been so happy with the way he's transitioned to this new way of life.  Actually, yesterday his uncle asked him about how starting kindergarten felt and told him he saw his picture from his first day of school and he replied with, "Oh, that was back when I was little."  :)  A week ago.  Kindergarten really makes you grow up, I guess.

Anyway, in the afternoon, it started drizzling.  I knew it might be a little rainy that day but I would take riding my bike in the rain far over riding my bike in the scorching sun!  So I didn't let it bother me too much.  I left early to be sure I was there on time and rode in a slight drizzle.  But as soon as I got to the school, it came down in buckets.  We took shelter in between the front doors until it let up right before the bell rang for Jameson to get out of school.  (Good thing I left early, right?)  We then headed back for home.  By this time, Jimmy had texted me letting me know he got home early.  I texted back asking if he wanted to rescue us, but he missed the text somehow.  In any case, we didn't need rescuing, we were being watched over.  As soon as we made it home, strapped the younger littlies out of the bike trailer and got in the house, it came down again just as it had before.

Coincidence?

Well, I've been reading this book lately, Embracing Coincidence by Carol Lynn Pearson, in which she relays many small stories of ways the Lord can touch her life or teach her little lessons or give her reminders every day in just little synchronicities or coincidences.  Since I'd been reading her cute little stories, I thought this was one example in my own life of a tender mercy shown to me by the Lord.  I think these things are often taken for granted.  So many things happen every day without our noticing.  I decided to notice more often.  So I began paying attention more carefully after that.

We were leaving for the long holiday weekend to go visit my sister.  So we got everything ready and headed out about 5:30.  On the way out of town we saw a big hawk dive down in front of the car.  It was beautiful and daring.  Simply breathtaking.  I took note of it.  Later as we were nearing the freeway, it happened again!  Another hawk, a little larger then the first, dove down in front of the car in almost the exact fashion.  I thought, wow.  That's quite the synchronicity.  But I wasn't sure what the message behind these hawks might be.  Perhaps they were reminders for me to watch the road and drive carefully.  That thought felt boring to me, so I kept trying to think up some other reason these hawks were putting on their show.  Because then after we were on the freeway, we were stuck in traffic (and of course I didn't stress out about it- remember my last post?) because of an accident up ahead and there it was!  A third hawk was flying along to the left of our car in the stop and go traffic.  It would sore to a great height and just hover there in the air as though it were suspended on a string.  I sat in awe to watch it and was grateful for the moment to be stuck in traffic at a standstill so we could watch the hawk do its tricks.  Still, I wasn't sure what kind of message I could gain from this beautiful synchronicity, so I kept paying attention.

The rest of the trip went on normally.  We stopped to get sandwiches from Arby's for dinner, and continued on.  Before we knew it, the sun had gone down and we were getting off the freeway.  I went to the allotted corner and turned to drive down the little road out into the countryside next to the town.  My sister lived a short way out of town.  There's a little blue building along the way which has longtime memories for me.  My grandparents also live down this road an have for generations.  The little blue building is the electric building where my grandfather worked and I remember always pointing it out in my childhood when we were excited that we were nearly there after the long roadtrip.

As I was approaching the blue building, I suddenly felt a small panicky feeling inside that told me I was driving too fast.  I was still in "freeway mode" and had begun to speed so I looked down at the speedometer and began to slow carefully.  But in the next moment, I looked up and noticed a long trail of lights to my right a short distance away.  I was approaching the intersection where the blue building stood on the corner and a semi truck was coming fast on the road perpendicular to mine.  The feeling increased as I realized this truck was not slowing!  He was approaching his stop sign with as much speed as I was approaching my throughway.  I had already begun to slow, but I had no idea how I would be able to stop.  I know I made some kind of explanation as we neared the intersection but I can't remember what it was.  I only remember coming to a halt just in time to see the semi whip it's way past in front of us, and I still have no idea how I stopped in time.

I was melted to the seat with my heart throbbing in my toes and my throat choking on air.  Somehow, we were still alive and unharmed.  I inched at about 25 to 30 miles per hour the rest of the way, thanking the Lord we were ok.

In the moment, I could only think about the moment.  But afterward I was given more understanding.  In an event like this, every second counts.  If I hadn't noticed I was speeding and slowed down to begin with, it would have been too late.  My entire little family was in that vehicle and any other result...well, the very thought makes me cringe away and I cannot imagine.

I am so grateful for the awareness of the Lord in my life.  I know it wasn't just me.  The story doesn't end here.

Yesterday as we were getting ready to leave my sister's and head home, my youngest littlie and baby boy nudged a 4 by 6 mirror and it felt right on him, shattering to pieces.  I was calm, but my sister felt it necessary to take him in to be checked for glass and I agreed that it would be the best thing to do.  He only ended up with a few superficial scratches on his head, face, and hand.  They appear almost like cat scratches, but finer.  There was one wider mark on his head that they ex-rayed to be sure there was no glass and all was well.  We noticed later that he had been next to the coffee table and must have fell flat down and so the mirror hit the table first and broke there to shower him with bits of glass.  He he had been between the table and the mirror, it would have been much worse.  Again, I am so grateful it was the way it was.

My sister told me stories, and I'm sure anyone reading this has their own, of people who have died in random ways.  Getting caught in just the right way between two solid objects or hit in just the right spot to be fatal.  So it goes both ways.  We talk about how sometimes these sad circumstances that end in deaths are just such flukes it's incredible.  However, we are so fragile in this life!  The fluke isn't that any of us die, it is that we are all still alive!  That's the fluke!  In every day of our lives, in every moment, there are things that could kill us.  We are fragile beings in this world that are faced with close calls at every tern.  That may seem to sound kind of paranoid, but it's not.  Because I know the reason why I am still alive.  I know the reason why we are all kept alive in this world.  And that reason is because there is someone all-knowing and all-loving who is watching over us.  When it is our time to go, it will be our time.

I know my time wasn't yesterday.  I don't know when my time may be.  So for the moment, I am going to live in this fragile life in a way that I know I will be proud of and in a way I won't have regrets.  I'm going to forgive a little quicker.  I'm going to allow a little more.  I'm going to smile longer.  I'm going to hold my children closer.  Because every moment is a blessing.  And I am so grateful for the Lord's protection in these moments.

Corny Muffins

Growing up, I used to love using this metaphor about friends that my closest friends were my muffins because they were baked in the same pan a me.

The metaphor was cute and well-intended but I have since realized how closed-minded I became when I thought this way.  I would categorized my friends and that is never a good thing. Sadly, I once even told someone I love that they were not one of my muffins.

This unequal frame of mind is not uncommon. Most people may not give it such a cute name, but everyone is guilty of discluding others at some time.

As I contemplated this metaphor something entered my mind.  We are nit all baked in the same pan. Some people are very different from others. But we are all made from the same batter. (I know this is corny...bear with me.) Some of us are over cooked or under cooked and wouldn't even know it if we never expanded our vision to those baked in other pans.

So I was thinking about this in a spiritual sense too. Knowing that we are all God's children, we need to see each other in the way He sees us. W are not all equal. Not really. We are all different, with different strengths and weaknesses. But we are all divinely worth the same. That worth is infinite!